I was just looking at my last three posts and I seem to have been all over the map the last few days. So, possibly tonight/this morning I will try to tie some of these thoughts together, as well as adjust to the time change. The clock on my computer says 12:07a.m., however my body and my mind says it is an hour earlier than that.The good thing about being A 70 Something Woman is that what time I get up and go to bed really arn't important, unless I have an appointment and I don't. Therefore I am allowed to cocoon as often as I need to. It also means that I have a lot of time to read the news, watch the news and get very depressed when I read about the devastation in Japan, New Zealand, Haiti and to many other places that are experiencing floods, earthquakes, wars, droughts and all kind of other terrible things. It sometimes makes me want to cocoon, relinquish everyhing that I might be hoarding and hope that the future gets a lot better for the world. It is sad that it takes so much devastation to remember how fortunate I am right now. Right now I know that my family are all warm, not hungry and I hope not frightened. I have also noticed something lately that I don't like; with all the talk on the radio and TV about all the tradegies, I find I am becoming hardened to the pain and loss of so many people in so many parts of the world. It is kind of like I am sponge and I have absorbed all of the sorrow and pain for all these peoples that I can, it is like I need to wrung out so I can absorb more. I don't know what I can do for people in Japan or Australia or anywhere else. I remember that I used to feel this, on a smaller scale of course, when I was working with individuals in their own emotional pain and turmoil. Some nights I would go home and just be quiet, no radio, no TV, just silence. I didn't want to hear one more persons pain, not on TV, not in a song, nowhere, During those times I would the sleep of a drugged person, not a restful sleep, more like a pass out sleep, with out the drugs or alcohol. I don't miss that part of my life. Tonight I am grateful that I do know that those I love, all of those I love are as well and safe as anyone can be in this world and I hope they sleeping and dreaming sweet dreams.
Manana
Monday, March 14th, 2011..........1:37a.m.
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