"My Mother taught me everything I needed to know about being a woman and a friend and my Mother In Law taught me everything I needed to know about being a wife and mother". These are words I over heard from my daughter while she was talking to a friend. My first reaction was to be a little bit hurt that I didn't teach her everything. I took a couple steps back in my mind and thought: What the hell could I teach anyone about being a wife? I was married twice by the time I was 20 and all I knew about marriage was that I didn't like it, in fact I disliked it immensely. During my marriages I always felt trapped, dependant and gagged. I felt like I could hardly breathe. I so envy my grandchildren. So far five of them have a had a child without the (benefit???) of marriage and everyone celebrates the birth if their children, including me, perhaps especially me. That was a definite NO NO in the 50s and 60s. There was a few words during that time period for women who had a child without having a husband and none of them were very nice.
On the other hand my daughter's Mother In Law appears to be a woman who really embraced marriage and Motherhood. She was married to husband for over 40 years before he died. They had 5 children, one of whom is my son in law; he is one the best people I have ever known. Molly, the Mother In Law has pretty well dedicated her life to her husband and her children. Now at age 77 she is constantly babysitting her great grandchildren, not just for a few hours here and there but everyday all day. I really like this woman and I admire her, I just know that I couldn't be her. And I am pretty sure that she would say she couldn't be me. I no longer feel any hurt or resentment about my daughter's words. She is right it took two women to teach her everything she had to know about having the well rounded life she enjoys today. And I thank Molly for her contribution.
Thoughts in the evening
Sunday, March 24th, 2012.........8:24p.m.
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