Today I will try to explain this battle that I sometimes feel I am losing, and other times feel that I am gaining on. Do you ever remember a time when you were a child and you did something really bad; something you knew you would be punished harshly for? It is kind of like that, like waiting for your parents to find out. And deciding to tell them yourself because you can no longer live with the waiting. Another example: What if you found a large lump in your breast and you had to wait until Friday to find out if it is benign or not. It is like the nerves are on the outside of my body instead of under the skin. That is the best way I can explain it and now I am finished trying.
I want to list somethings that I am grateful for, just to balance out the bitching part of my blog. To friends I seen and spent time with this weekend, to Carol, Karen, Maureen and especially Harold for giving me the sancuary of his home. I am grateful for my family, to Tami, my daughter for understanding, to Dennis just for being Dennis and to Jonathon for grandson love. I am grateful for Jim who calls and seems to understand. I am grateful that I have a new Dr, who I will see on Friday. I am going to try to blog everyday until this is over.
Whoa.............that was hard. I hope tomorrow is easier.
Monday, September 26, 2011..........4:22p.m.
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