Random Trivia

l almost didn't blog tonight, but I hate breaking promises to others and especially breaking them to myself.  Last night I was thinking that I seem to have a lot of useless information stored away in my brain.  So I will share one piece with you tonight.

Maybe most of you know where the term "Ragtime" music came from.  I didn't up until a few years ago when I read about it.  According to source that I read ragtime music was coined in the United States over a hundred years ago. In houses of ill repute (don't you love that term) when the working ladies were having their monthly menstral cycle they were expected to still entertain the male customers.  Since they couldn't do their usual gig, these ladies were to dance instead.  These women were referred to as "being on the rag" and the music was called ragtime.

Interesting huh....................

Monday, October 31st, 2011............10:21p.m.

Leonard Cohen Lyrics

"Forget your perfect offering.  There is a crack in everything; That is how the light gets in."  I heard this song on my car readio this afternoon while driving to meet a friend for lunch.  All I remember are these 3 lines.  They were enough to get my mind bending and twisting with feeling.  I thought "there is no perfect thing and if there was it would probably be kind of boring.  Even in rare works of art it is the little imperfections that makes them special.

Think about it; when your child started to talk, I'll bet it was the word that they mispronouced that you remember, that you will still remember and talk about 30 years later.  There is a crack in everything and that is how the light gets in.  And without the light we wouldn't be able to see it at all.

Afternoon Thoughts

Sunday, October 30, 2011.............5:12 p.m.

Salt

I know a little bit about salt.  Some of it I learned from the CBC, my favorite source of information, the rest I have researched.  Up until over a hundred years ago salt was used as a currency in many parts of the world.  If you ever wondered where the saying came from "He is not worth his salt." now you know.  Many words came from the practise of using salt as a currency, among them are "salary" and "soldier".  Apparently for a long time men who fought for their country were paid in salt.  Many think that salts ability to preserve food played a great part in the civilization of our world.

I believe the last salt tax was removed in 1947.  It has been documented that whatever controlled the salt supply almost always won the war, as the salt tax was usually used for weapons and of course to pay soldiers.  Apparently the words "A pinch of salt" had great meaning time when salt was a currency.

I am feeling some better, at least enough to write about something besides my own woes.  Sometimes I still feel that "I am not worth my salt".

Afternoon Thoughts

October 9th, 2001............5:01 p.m.

Gratitude List

Today I really want to gripe and bitch about many things.  I want to talk about my anxiety, depression, fears and most of all about the hurt I feel.  Instead I am going to make a "Gratitude List" because even I am tired of hearing myself whine.

I am grateful that I live in this house with this family.

I am grateful that I have lived for almost 73 years, so many I have known have had less time.  And a lot of those who were given less time didn't abuse their bodies with substances that I have.

I am grateful for bed.  It is so comfortable and inviting.

I am grateful to friends who will spend time with me, even when I am not the best company.

I am grateful that I have been alcohol free for almost 25 years.

I am grateful that the children I carried and gave birth to are healthy and as loving as they are, and to the ones that I didn't give birth to, that love me also.

I needed to do this.

Afternoon Thoughts

Friday, October 28th, 2011..........5:04 p.m.

Storms And Depressions

I am still climbing out of the deep pit of depression and anxiety.  And for reasons unknown, even to me, I have resisted one of the few things that will help; WRITING.

I have always had mixed feeling about storms.  Part of me find them exciting and the other part of me finds them very scary.  I went to the computer for definition of depression when applied to weather and here is what I found: "once a group of thunderstorms has come together under the right atmospheric conditions they will creat a depression".  What a great analogy fior the way I have been feeling.  The condition must have been right (I know they were)  to cause this atmospheric depression inside my head and body.

For those of you who have been fortunate enough to have never experienced anxiety and depression I will try to explain some of the feelings associated with it.  There is always a feeling pending doom.  A strong tendency to isolate, a feeling of not being safe, and for me a need of being structured, almost to point of OCD "obsessive compulsive disorder".  I may not want to be alone, yet when I am with someone I want to go home.  I usually need to talk, yet will feel unable to verbalize.  I woked in mental health for many years and know so much about the condition yet I am unable right now to apply that knowledge to myself except on a academic level.  There I have started.  Will write more on the theory of storms and depression tomorrow.

Thursday, October 28th, 2011...........1:42p.m.