Less than 3 months ago my daughter Tami and her husband Dennis lost their son Charles. And I lost a grandson, and his two little boys lost a daddy, and his brothers lost a brother and his niece and nephews lost an uncle. And his life partner Stephanie lost her partner and the father of her children. The ripples get larger and larger as we include best friends and work colleagues.
Charles was an electrician like his dad. He was the one of our family who could stand still with 2 humming bid feeders in his hands and the birds would be all over him, they sensed his gentle soul and obviously trusted him. His smile was contagious. Everyone smiled with him. He was not a saint, he was human enough to be real and it was that side of him that I especially loved. I am so fortunate that my grandchildren like me, as well as love me. With almost everyone of them I have a special relationship in which they allow themselves to be vulnerable and honest, without fear of judgment or recriminations. Because of that I was privy to a lot of their feelings, both good and not so good. That relationship with Charles let me know him as the man he had become. A sensitive, loving, and kind man. This man held his Mother and Father in Awe, as he should have because they are awesome people as well as parents.
He was a great brother, loved and admired by his brothers, as he admired them, each one for different reasons. This was one of the talks we had. During that talk he was telling me how much he loved his parents and that he hoped he would make them proud and they wouldn't be disappointed in him. He talked to me about each of his brothers, discussing both their strengths and possible weakness's. These were usually strengths and weakness's that he recognized because most of them resided in himself. It is hard to believe that any talks I have with him from now on he will not be present or so many believe. Me?? Well I feel his presence so often that I know he remains close to us all. He will never have knees that have to be replaced and pain that arthritis and other aging problems bring about. He will remain young and beautiful and loved by myself and every person who had the privilege of knowing him long enough to know the amazing man he was.
p.s. Thank you for the gifts you surprise with every so often. I recognize them and I am grateful.
Wednesday, September 16, 2015........9:20p.m.
Wednesday, September 16, 2015
Monday, June 1, 2015
Grandmas
I like being a Grandma and I think I am a better Grandma than I was a Mother. That hurts even as I write it, but I have made my peace with that part of my life. I had my first child right after my 16th birthday and my 4th and last child 2 months before my 23 birthday. At that time I also had 3 stepchildren. Seven children at 23 is a lot. One of the good things is that at 23 you are, or at least I was, full of energy and I could keep up with the physical demands of 7 children.
At 23 I was also wrapped up in myself. I had not had the teen years that most of us get to work through a lot of the things. I now realize that this is true in a large percentage of people. Until approximately age 40 we are not grown up enough to truly put another human being before ourselves, at least not on a full time basis. We have our own relationships, careers and lives to live. Many of us try very hard to parent and every child has their own set of needs and personality quirks, making it a brand new experience with each child.
My first memory of a grandparent is strange and vague. When I was 3 apparently we lived with my Aunt Emily. My Mother and Father had seperated, my baby sister was still very much a baby and for whatever reason we ended up living with Aunt Emily and Uncle Gord and their 5 children. I don't actually remember many events but I do remember feelings and I know I felt unsafe there. Perhaps I was born feeling unsafe, it seems to something I carry around with me from place to place. At Aunt Emily's I remember my first interaction with a Grandma figure She wasn't even a biological grandma. Apparently she rented a room from my Aunt and uncle. I had to be about 3 years old. My cousins were noisy and rough, all male except one. When I was scared or being hurt by them, I remember this old (she had to be younger than I am now) woman. She would take me into her room and hold me on her lap. This is about 74 years ago. i called her grandma Hair. I believe that is what everyone called her.
Grandma Hair's room had a round black stove in it. She used to take something that lifted the lid off part of the stove and she would put bread over the heat and toast it and feed me. I remember this woman, yet I forget the house and everything else about this time of my life. I remember thinking, even at 3 or 4 years old that it was strange her name was Hair. I am not even sure now if the spelling is correct. I remember her and the warmth and attention she paid me. It felt like she took me out of a herd of dangerous animals and rescued me for at a short time. Once we moved away I never seen again and I never forgot her either.
Monday June 1st, 2015.........2:00p.m.
At 23 I was also wrapped up in myself. I had not had the teen years that most of us get to work through a lot of the things. I now realize that this is true in a large percentage of people. Until approximately age 40 we are not grown up enough to truly put another human being before ourselves, at least not on a full time basis. We have our own relationships, careers and lives to live. Many of us try very hard to parent and every child has their own set of needs and personality quirks, making it a brand new experience with each child.
My first memory of a grandparent is strange and vague. When I was 3 apparently we lived with my Aunt Emily. My Mother and Father had seperated, my baby sister was still very much a baby and for whatever reason we ended up living with Aunt Emily and Uncle Gord and their 5 children. I don't actually remember many events but I do remember feelings and I know I felt unsafe there. Perhaps I was born feeling unsafe, it seems to something I carry around with me from place to place. At Aunt Emily's I remember my first interaction with a Grandma figure She wasn't even a biological grandma. Apparently she rented a room from my Aunt and uncle. I had to be about 3 years old. My cousins were noisy and rough, all male except one. When I was scared or being hurt by them, I remember this old (she had to be younger than I am now) woman. She would take me into her room and hold me on her lap. This is about 74 years ago. i called her grandma Hair. I believe that is what everyone called her.
Grandma Hair's room had a round black stove in it. She used to take something that lifted the lid off part of the stove and she would put bread over the heat and toast it and feed me. I remember this woman, yet I forget the house and everything else about this time of my life. I remember thinking, even at 3 or 4 years old that it was strange her name was Hair. I am not even sure now if the spelling is correct. I remember her and the warmth and attention she paid me. It felt like she took me out of a herd of dangerous animals and rescued me for at a short time. Once we moved away I never seen again and I never forgot her either.
Monday June 1st, 2015.........2:00p.m.
Friday, January 30, 2015
Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, Happy Groundhog Day And An Early Happy Valentine Day
Last Year, late fall or early winter, I got locked out of my blog and I am so computer savvy that I remained locked out until today, The really sad part is I am not sure how or why I got in today when I havn't been able to for months. The other sad thing is that so many things have happened that I could have, should have blogged about and now that I am on I feel unprepared. So, I will just start with whatever comes to mind first.
A few weeks ago we had to put our German Shepherd Six down. I wanted to write that we "lost", in fact I did write lost, then backspaced and put down a more accurate account. We didn't lose her, although I have felt a great loss since her death. We had her put down, even that terminology feels wrong, we had her "euthanized" that is the correct term, even if I am uncomfortable with it. A couple of years ago we went through this same ordeal with Poppy, our beloved Lab. She became a $5000 dog. This was done for our sake, not hers. When Six became ill and was bleeding heavy vaginally the really sad part for me was seeing and sensing the shame she felt for making a mess in the house. She was a clean dog, I think she would have crossed her legs all night rather than make a mess in the house.
That is the sad part of 2015. There was much joy and happiness also. Christmas and New Years is always a happy time here. This definitely is "The House Where Love Lives" Now that I am back I hope to be on almost daily for the winter, as the driveway is long and drifted with snow and my car is not 4 wheel drive. This is my hibernation time. Me, my computer, the Television and lots of Library books.
Friday, January 30th, 2015........2:28p.m.
A few weeks ago we had to put our German Shepherd Six down. I wanted to write that we "lost", in fact I did write lost, then backspaced and put down a more accurate account. We didn't lose her, although I have felt a great loss since her death. We had her put down, even that terminology feels wrong, we had her "euthanized" that is the correct term, even if I am uncomfortable with it. A couple of years ago we went through this same ordeal with Poppy, our beloved Lab. She became a $5000 dog. This was done for our sake, not hers. When Six became ill and was bleeding heavy vaginally the really sad part for me was seeing and sensing the shame she felt for making a mess in the house. She was a clean dog, I think she would have crossed her legs all night rather than make a mess in the house.
That is the sad part of 2015. There was much joy and happiness also. Christmas and New Years is always a happy time here. This definitely is "The House Where Love Lives" Now that I am back I hope to be on almost daily for the winter, as the driveway is long and drifted with snow and my car is not 4 wheel drive. This is my hibernation time. Me, my computer, the Television and lots of Library books.
Friday, January 30th, 2015........2:28p.m.
Monday, October 20, 2014
This Old House
This is a picture of our house taken last year over the Christmas Holidays. I had my son in law take a picture for me. I told him I wanted it for a screen saver but the moment I saw the fading light on the snow and the Christmas lights I knew I wanted it to be a painting, It was finished the end of June and I kept it until the first week of September, when my son in law's birthday falls on the 1st and my daughter's falls on the 5th; their birthdays are celebrated jointly in Labour Day weekend.
The picture was certainly a surprise. I like getting things for this branch of my family; probably because I know what would be really appreciated and more important, what is needed. My gifts are usually practical, like prepaying an amount on their hydro bill and propane bill every winter. Those things are really appreciated and seeing as I don't pay rent I feel good about contributing to the household, The painting was really something different and when they opened it they looked as surprised as they did happy, As days went by over the next couple of weeks I heard more and more comments about the picture and I came to realize how much they were enjoying it. The picture was painted by Brenda Depres, an artist whose work I am familiar with and enjoy. I will put her website at the bottom of this post for anyone who is interested.
I would like to have a four season collage of our home and the property attached. Because this house is so old, 1875, there is major renovations everywhere. Many have already been done and still more are on the to do list, This summer we have a bricklayer doing renovation and repointing with yellow bricks almost 140 years old. This is a big 4 bedroom home and every new venture is expensive. We are trying hard to keep the old homestead feeling , This is a home, that houses 3 generations at all times and quite often 4 generations with my great grandsons. The house expands when someone needs a home for a few weeks or months, then effortlessly shrinks back when that person moves on. I have always felt it is the perfect place to come and heal, physically heal, emotionally heal and any other kind of healing a person needs throughout their lifetime.
https://www.facebook.com/ArtisticImpressionsbybldespres
Monday, October 20th, 2014,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,9:16p.m.
Saturday, September 27, 2014
SUMMER..............It's Over
In South Western Ontario the leaves are changing. Signs of autumn showing everywhere. There is a part of me that wants to say "Whew, Made It Through That". That is more often a feeling at the end of winter. I love this time of year, it is like every year I am taken in again, fooled again into believing these sunny days and nice cool nights will be with us for a while, all the time knowing that around the next couple of corners lay snow, blowing snow, freezing snow, every kind of snow you can imagine we get here and we get it in abundance, But right now I am enjoying the riot of colour and the warm days and cool nights, even while knowing all the while what is coming. There is still a lot of colour from my daughter's gardens, although the Morning Glory's no longer open and face the sun in the morning, other hardier plants are still looming in gardens and on our deck.
We are normally a hardy bunch here and the autumn seems to be bringing with it some health problems for the more senior members of our large tribe. At almost 76 years old that would include me, but as of now aside from suffering with my knees, my health remains good. On the 26th of August I quit smoking, so I have just over a month in. This is it for me. I was beginning to notice things like getting of breath all of the time, which is exacerbated by the weight problem. I used that excuse for so long not to quit smoking. Finally I stood in front of a mirror nude, do you have any idea the amount of courage that takes?, anyway I did and said to myself "you are already fat, so this is the best time in the world to quit smoking" and I did. I don't like ridged plans or schedules, for me something flexible always works better; thus I am not doing anything stupid like dieting or weighing myself until at least spring. One thing at a time and this fall and winter are dedicated to not smoking.
It is not my health that I meant to discuss here. Dennis, my son in law, has the health problems in his family right now. Dennis's Mother, Molly discovered a mass in her breast. She has already had one operation and another is scheduled for 2nd of October. To really complicate things, Molly's mother Hilda is 103 and still alive. Hilda enjoys quite good health for someone that age. The thing is Hilda is ready to go, she is more than ready and has told everyone so. Hilda has already lost 2 of her 4 children to cancer and she feels she can't and won't do this again. I am with her ENOUGH already.
Hilda also needs some care, at 103 her vision is gone, she needs the basic help any person over 100 needs. Tami, my daughter id going to kitchener, about a 2 hour drive from here, on October 1st so she will be the primary caregiver to Molly and Hilda when Molly gets out of hospital on the 2nd of October. This kind of shifts things around here. I will take on some of the things Tami does and Jon my 18 year old grandson will help. Dennis is working in Alberta and is away working for 2 weeks, then flies home for a week. We will all do our part and do the best we can.
Tami and Dennis celebrated their birthdays the first week in September and I had a painting of this home commissioned by an artist. The picture was taken last Christmas and I am going to get Jonathon to show me how to put the picture on my blog, so next blog will come with picture.
We are normally a hardy bunch here and the autumn seems to be bringing with it some health problems for the more senior members of our large tribe. At almost 76 years old that would include me, but as of now aside from suffering with my knees, my health remains good. On the 26th of August I quit smoking, so I have just over a month in. This is it for me. I was beginning to notice things like getting of breath all of the time, which is exacerbated by the weight problem. I used that excuse for so long not to quit smoking. Finally I stood in front of a mirror nude, do you have any idea the amount of courage that takes?, anyway I did and said to myself "you are already fat, so this is the best time in the world to quit smoking" and I did. I don't like ridged plans or schedules, for me something flexible always works better; thus I am not doing anything stupid like dieting or weighing myself until at least spring. One thing at a time and this fall and winter are dedicated to not smoking.
It is not my health that I meant to discuss here. Dennis, my son in law, has the health problems in his family right now. Dennis's Mother, Molly discovered a mass in her breast. She has already had one operation and another is scheduled for 2nd of October. To really complicate things, Molly's mother Hilda is 103 and still alive. Hilda enjoys quite good health for someone that age. The thing is Hilda is ready to go, she is more than ready and has told everyone so. Hilda has already lost 2 of her 4 children to cancer and she feels she can't and won't do this again. I am with her ENOUGH already.
Hilda also needs some care, at 103 her vision is gone, she needs the basic help any person over 100 needs. Tami, my daughter id going to kitchener, about a 2 hour drive from here, on October 1st so she will be the primary caregiver to Molly and Hilda when Molly gets out of hospital on the 2nd of October. This kind of shifts things around here. I will take on some of the things Tami does and Jon my 18 year old grandson will help. Dennis is working in Alberta and is away working for 2 weeks, then flies home for a week. We will all do our part and do the best we can.
Tami and Dennis celebrated their birthdays the first week in September and I had a painting of this home commissioned by an artist. The picture was taken last Christmas and I am going to get Jonathon to show me how to put the picture on my blog, so next blog will come with picture.
Friday, August 15, 2014
July and Half Of August
It seems the longer I put off blogging the harder it becomes. So many things happen, I think I should blog about, (I KNOW I should blog about them) but I don't; then I almost become uncomfortable, apprehensive, who I am kidding, I feel fear to start again. It is liking losing touch with a loved one, more and more time goes by and it gets harder and harder to make that call. I really blog for myself and except for 2 or 3 people that I know read it no one probably even reads it,
Babies have been born in my family, others celebrated their 4th and 2nd and 5th birthday/ My son has turned 54 and my daughter will celebrate her 53rd birthday soon, New pets have joined our household, one a cat named Bert was killed on the road. Ernie, his brother is still with us. Bert has been replaced by Jeepers, a tiny scrap of baby kitty whom we didn't think would live thru the day when we rescued him, Today he running around the house, jumping, tumbling and doing baby kitty things bringing joy only infant animals, baby humans included can do.
There has been good news, my daughter is finished working nights and has a line on an interesting job, my youngest grandson has a good paying summer job, with which he is paying off the loan given him after the accident. People have died, some we know, some we didn;t like Robin Williams. I am sure over the summer people around me have fought to hangon and some people have fought to let go. I have tried to make decisions that other see as black and white and I see as many shades of grey. I am not nearly as sure of things at 75 as I was at 35, I see this as a good thing, possibly others see it as my floundering to make up my mind and being indecisive.
We had baby chicks this year. I think we got them in mid May and they buthchered a week or two ago. Those tiny yellow chicks wieghed just a few ounces and are 5 pound chickens in our freezer now. As for the weather, this was my kind of summer........cool. Many missed the extreme heat, not me, heat is hard on me, always has been, I am carrying about 50 lbs of extra weight. My knees hurt all the time, making excersizing painful, making weight loss almost impossible. I seem to go round and round with this problem, I have almost made peace with myself and this issue. I will be 76 years old this November and I want to enjoy these years and food is something I enjoy,
I have attended many of my12 step meeting groups, as the roads are good, I have nurtured and cared for my friends in this group and they have loved and comforted me back. As in any group many new people are coming for help, some will stay and get their health and life bacl. Unfortunately others will not stay, possibly I will see them around the tables in a year or so, maybe not....... inevitably some will die. I give what I can and do what I can. I enjoy life as it continues around me.
August 15th, 2012.............8:45 p.m.
Babies have been born in my family, others celebrated their 4th and 2nd and 5th birthday/ My son has turned 54 and my daughter will celebrate her 53rd birthday soon, New pets have joined our household, one a cat named Bert was killed on the road. Ernie, his brother is still with us. Bert has been replaced by Jeepers, a tiny scrap of baby kitty whom we didn't think would live thru the day when we rescued him, Today he running around the house, jumping, tumbling and doing baby kitty things bringing joy only infant animals, baby humans included can do.
There has been good news, my daughter is finished working nights and has a line on an interesting job, my youngest grandson has a good paying summer job, with which he is paying off the loan given him after the accident. People have died, some we know, some we didn;t like Robin Williams. I am sure over the summer people around me have fought to hangon and some people have fought to let go. I have tried to make decisions that other see as black and white and I see as many shades of grey. I am not nearly as sure of things at 75 as I was at 35, I see this as a good thing, possibly others see it as my floundering to make up my mind and being indecisive.
We had baby chicks this year. I think we got them in mid May and they buthchered a week or two ago. Those tiny yellow chicks wieghed just a few ounces and are 5 pound chickens in our freezer now. As for the weather, this was my kind of summer........cool. Many missed the extreme heat, not me, heat is hard on me, always has been, I am carrying about 50 lbs of extra weight. My knees hurt all the time, making excersizing painful, making weight loss almost impossible. I seem to go round and round with this problem, I have almost made peace with myself and this issue. I will be 76 years old this November and I want to enjoy these years and food is something I enjoy,
I have attended many of my12 step meeting groups, as the roads are good, I have nurtured and cared for my friends in this group and they have loved and comforted me back. As in any group many new people are coming for help, some will stay and get their health and life bacl. Unfortunately others will not stay, possibly I will see them around the tables in a year or so, maybe not....... inevitably some will die. I give what I can and do what I can. I enjoy life as it continues around me.
August 15th, 2012.............8:45 p.m.
Friday, June 13, 2014
Grandma Love
Yesterday my Grandson Jonathon was in his first accident as a new driver. I feel the need to write about my relationship with Jonathon as well as the accident.
Approx 19 years ago when my daughter told me she wanted another child I was less than thrilled. And for selfish reasons. Tami, my daughter is my baby and she had two sons; James was 13 and Charles was 12 at the time. I was hoping that now that boys were reaching their teens she would have more time to spend with me. We lived hours away from each oher and we were both working fulltime and were lucky to get together 2 or 3 times a year. I was hoping that would change as her boys became the age they were. I didn't say that of course even though I thought it. Sure enough the next time I heard from Tami she was pregnant. She was 34 years old, which I think is young, and her pregnancy was monitered pretty closely.On April 7th, 1996 Jonathon was born. It was Easter Sunday and through circumstances unplanned by me I was at the Hospital for the birth, My fiance Paul was with me, he was was stage 4 of colon cancer at the time.
Jonathon was a little bit early and a little under 5 lbs. He was also breach and a difficult labour. Because Tami had an epideral and was kept in recovery a little longer a nurse brought out Jonathon. He was naked except for a towel. For some reason the nurse assumed my fiance was the grandpa and put the bay in Pauls arms. This was the first time in his life that Paul had held a newborn and he was really nervous as well as overwhelmed by this less than 5 lb piece of brand new humanity. Paul had a daughter but because of his work she was weeks old before he saw her. I looked at him with this naked little boy in his arms and felt pretty overwhelmed myself.
Jonathon looked so much like my daughter when she was brand new. He even had the same fringe of red hair around his head, and like his Mother that fringe of new penny copper hair came out in a few weeks and platinum blond hair came in. O.K. enough remenicing about my baby and her baby.
When Jonathon was 12 in 2008 my job was abrupted ended with the Ministy of Health. I was shocked, hurt and felt a lot of betrayal. I had my own little mini crisis and Tami came to me because she was concerned. A month or so later she asked me to come here. I accepted, still is shock and emotional pain. The plan was that I stay for a couple of weeks. That was over 6years ago.
During these 6 years I have watched Jonathon turn from a little boy into a young man. What a privledge and a joy that has been. With my own children I was so busy, first mothering, then working, going to school and mothering, that I missed the little nuances that brings a child into adulthood. Being the baby of the family Jonathon was allowed, perhaps even encouraged to remain a little boy much longer than his brothers, My daughter and her husband Dennis are exceptable parents, in my opinion.
About a month ago Jonathon had another rite of passage, he became a licsened driver. He had been driving the tractor and other recreational since he was about 10. Jonathon works part time as well as finishing his last year of high school. Because his dad works in Saskatchewan. Jon was allowed to drive his dads truck to work and back. Before his dad left for out west this time he had a long man to man talk with Jon and promised to be very careful with the truck. Yesterday at about 4p.m. the phone rang and it was Jon's voice I heard. He was crying and almost hysterical. I just asked him where he was and got in my car and went to him. There was police cruiser parked in front of the address and the truck Jon was driving beside it, also a large red van with a dent in the passenger rear side. I got out of my car as quickly as my old knees allowed and went to Jon, who was sobbing and shaking, I just held in my arms as he sobbed "I promised dad I would be careful" over and over and I just held him tighter. The police officer was a woman and the person driving the van was a woman who two sons of her own aged 20 and 22. These two women looked at Jon like they wanted to hug him too. Insurance information was exchanged. The woman police officer and the lady with the van talked with me and it was agreed that she would not contact her Insurance but instead take her car into a repair shop and get an estimate that we could and did decide to pay ourselves. Jon will pay for this through weekly payments.
It was a stressful but loving day. The two women had such compassion for Jon and I think for me.
It felt like everyone involved was doing their best to help this man/child. And I knew my job as a "Grandma" was just to hold this child and reassure him, then help him find a way to deal with it.
THAT IS GRANDMA LOVE,
Approx 19 years ago when my daughter told me she wanted another child I was less than thrilled. And for selfish reasons. Tami, my daughter is my baby and she had two sons; James was 13 and Charles was 12 at the time. I was hoping that now that boys were reaching their teens she would have more time to spend with me. We lived hours away from each oher and we were both working fulltime and were lucky to get together 2 or 3 times a year. I was hoping that would change as her boys became the age they were. I didn't say that of course even though I thought it. Sure enough the next time I heard from Tami she was pregnant. She was 34 years old, which I think is young, and her pregnancy was monitered pretty closely.On April 7th, 1996 Jonathon was born. It was Easter Sunday and through circumstances unplanned by me I was at the Hospital for the birth, My fiance Paul was with me, he was was stage 4 of colon cancer at the time.
Jonathon was a little bit early and a little under 5 lbs. He was also breach and a difficult labour. Because Tami had an epideral and was kept in recovery a little longer a nurse brought out Jonathon. He was naked except for a towel. For some reason the nurse assumed my fiance was the grandpa and put the bay in Pauls arms. This was the first time in his life that Paul had held a newborn and he was really nervous as well as overwhelmed by this less than 5 lb piece of brand new humanity. Paul had a daughter but because of his work she was weeks old before he saw her. I looked at him with this naked little boy in his arms and felt pretty overwhelmed myself.
Jonathon looked so much like my daughter when she was brand new. He even had the same fringe of red hair around his head, and like his Mother that fringe of new penny copper hair came out in a few weeks and platinum blond hair came in. O.K. enough remenicing about my baby and her baby.
When Jonathon was 12 in 2008 my job was abrupted ended with the Ministy of Health. I was shocked, hurt and felt a lot of betrayal. I had my own little mini crisis and Tami came to me because she was concerned. A month or so later she asked me to come here. I accepted, still is shock and emotional pain. The plan was that I stay for a couple of weeks. That was over 6years ago.
During these 6 years I have watched Jonathon turn from a little boy into a young man. What a privledge and a joy that has been. With my own children I was so busy, first mothering, then working, going to school and mothering, that I missed the little nuances that brings a child into adulthood. Being the baby of the family Jonathon was allowed, perhaps even encouraged to remain a little boy much longer than his brothers, My daughter and her husband Dennis are exceptable parents, in my opinion.
About a month ago Jonathon had another rite of passage, he became a licsened driver. He had been driving the tractor and other recreational since he was about 10. Jonathon works part time as well as finishing his last year of high school. Because his dad works in Saskatchewan. Jon was allowed to drive his dads truck to work and back. Before his dad left for out west this time he had a long man to man talk with Jon and promised to be very careful with the truck. Yesterday at about 4p.m. the phone rang and it was Jon's voice I heard. He was crying and almost hysterical. I just asked him where he was and got in my car and went to him. There was police cruiser parked in front of the address and the truck Jon was driving beside it, also a large red van with a dent in the passenger rear side. I got out of my car as quickly as my old knees allowed and went to Jon, who was sobbing and shaking, I just held in my arms as he sobbed "I promised dad I would be careful" over and over and I just held him tighter. The police officer was a woman and the person driving the van was a woman who two sons of her own aged 20 and 22. These two women looked at Jon like they wanted to hug him too. Insurance information was exchanged. The woman police officer and the lady with the van talked with me and it was agreed that she would not contact her Insurance but instead take her car into a repair shop and get an estimate that we could and did decide to pay ourselves. Jon will pay for this through weekly payments.
It was a stressful but loving day. The two women had such compassion for Jon and I think for me.
It felt like everyone involved was doing their best to help this man/child. And I knew my job as a "Grandma" was just to hold this child and reassure him, then help him find a way to deal with it.
THAT IS GRANDMA LOVE,
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