I spent almost all of February pet/house sitting for a friend, while her husband had bowel surgery. Their house is only a 15 minute drive from home, however, in February in Bruce County, where I live, that is a long way. Our winter has been hard even for a Bruce County winter. When I moved in with my daughter and her family I decided that I wasn't ready for full retirement and started a small business looking after people's homes and pets while they were away. This wasn't to augment my income as much as to give me a purpose, something to do and feel good about.
I constantly surprise myself at how chameleon I am. Within 24 hours of moving into someone else's home I feel comfortable and change my routine to fit the dogs, cats or whatever and the motion of the house. Houses have motions and they are all different. The way the furnace or air conditioning clicks in and the fridge runs, what time the water softener back washes as well as the special creaks and moans from heat, cold, or wind.
Also when I am alone with just the pets and plants and all is quiet my minds slides back into the past and memories from the past flood me, memories that are much easier to push back down or smother when I am in my home with the comings and goings of all of our household.
Part the memories that kept appearing the past 3 weeks included the suicide of my step daughter when she was 15 and I was 25 years old. I decided while I was away that this was something I needed to blog about and I will, probably in my next blog. Some scars never really heal and sometimes not looking at them is more difficult than finding the courage to let the light in and reexamining the event and the feelings squished so tightly around around them and over them.
Wednesday, February 26th, 2014.....8:06p.m.
